"Rainy Days and Mondays...

...always get me down."

I've had a wonderful weekend at home with my family these past few days. It was wonderful in part because Friday was my birthday, but also because my dad and step-mom were visiting from Newfoundland. I haven't seen them since last August, and I haven't spent my birthday with my dad since I was fourteen. The kids were thrilled to have someone new to showcase their talents in front of, and I think my parents were just as delighted to sit and enjoy the quirky little people that are their grand kids.

With me still recovering from my surgery three weeks ago and my father recovering from shoulder surgery a week ago, it really didn't take too much to tire either one of us out. As is typical of my parents, they spoiled us all rotten - Olive took Maddie and I shoe shopping, and Dad managed to BBQ the most amazing steaks with one arm in a sling. By the time evening fell though, we were more than ready to sit and relax in front of a crackling fire. It was comforting, having them here, and it felt good to feel connected to family again.

I've mentioned before that it's not so much the "where I grew up" that I feel a longing for, but rather the "how". I know my childhood was less than ideal, but I had a great younger childhood and my dad played a huge part in that. He was a very "hands-on" parent, always involved and introducing us to new things. After he and my mom divorced, most of my relationships with extended family and other positives in my life also disappeared, and so I've always associated the happier times with him.

This morning Dad and Olive left for Nova Scotia, where they will stay until next week before returning to Newfoundland. I've learned to deal with the good-byes over the last nineteen years, and they've become easier. I know that I will see them again soon, likely within the year. Somehow, that doesn't make it any easier, and I know that I will miss my dad. Suddenly I am fourteen again. The sadness I feel every time I say good-bye to him has lodged itself in my throat, and the ache of "homesickness" that had eased while he was here has settled once again in my chest.

I really hope the sun comes out tomorrow, but for today, it can rain.