Friday, December 16, 2005

Bah, Humbug!!

OOOH! A new post!!!

Just in case you've been wondering, I haven't dropped off the face of the earth. Our internet has totally sucked, and I've actually been a very busy girl...
I wish I could say that I was busy because I was baking tons of Christmas goodies for my children, and happily assembling gingerbread houses while Bing Crosby croons holiday carols softly in the background.
I even wish I could say that I was busy decorating my home with fragrant boughs of evergreen and garlands made from dried cranberries and citrus slices.
But it would all be untrue.
I still don't even have a Christmas tree. Christmas Eve is a week from today. I have some shopping done, but I'm not finished. Nothing is wrapped, and I haven't sent one Holiday card. The oven was turned on once to heat garlic fingers when everyone was too tired and hungry to even really care what we had for supper. The last thing I made with my own two hands was Play-Dough, and that was just to stop the kids from fighting over the hard crusty ball of petrified Play-Doh that someone found under the sofa. I think it was a hundred years old. Sad times, indeed.

In actual fact, I have been spending about 70% of my time in the crapper, doubled over in pain and sounding like I spent the previous night pounding back the shots of Rhum. Not fun. I eat, it comes out. One helluva way to lose weight. Some days are better than others, but still.
The other 30% of my time has been spent visiting the Dr. trying to figure out what has been going on with my body, struggling with my exhaustion from it all, and trying to be a wife and mother. My calendar now looks like a busy executive's day book, with appointments scribbled here and there, and times and dates are written on the kids' artwork that hangs on the fridge.
So far we (by we I mean the Dr.) think it could be Crohn's Disease or Colitis. We've ruled out infection or a virus, and food poisoning. As a little treat to myself after Christmas, I am scheduled for a scope on the 28th of Dec. Nothing like a little inspection of the lower intestines and bowel to ring in the New Year, right? Wait, it gets better. Dad , if you're reading this, you might want to stop here, things get a little "girly". You too Levi. The next little bit contains way too much information, but that's never stopped me before...
I've also been having period problems. Big time. Like every two weeks and very heavy. And then when that's not happening, I also get treated to nasty little bouts of Candida. (yeast infections) So, I also have appointments scheduled with the specialist for that. What really scares me is that the "H" word has ben mentioned a few times. Even once is too much. I mean, I know I'm not planning to have any more kids, but seriously. I'm only 30!
Did anyone check the warranty on my uterus or colon?!?
As a result, I'm finding it really hard to get into the Christmas mood, and I feel badly for my family. Normally I have the tree up well before the middle of the month, and the gifts are usually under the tree, wrapped and ready to be ripped into. Cookies are often made, and things are generally festive. Levi has been a real trooper through all this, and is keeping the house well stocked with toilet paper for me. He put up the outside lights on Saturday. The kids are really excited for Santa to come, and I don't want to take away from that. We just had two storm days and that helped a bit, now that is is actually starting to look like Christmas. Madeline, Connor and I wrote letters to Santa yesterday, and all of us did Christmas anagrams and Christmas word searches and crossword puzzles. So that also helped.
Still, a part of me just wants to say "Bah, Humbug!" about the whole thing, and put Christmas off until I feel better.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey Amy,

I'm glad to hear that you finally got your tree on Friday. Now hopefully you spent the weekend by wrapping gifts and baking cookies for Santa. Have a Merry Christmas.

Tanya said...

oh dear god! :( so sorry you're having such a terrible time...ugh. doesn't sound fun in the least.

i'll call you this week before we take off for the cottage...

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the well wishes guys. I had another appointment today. This "specialist" went where nobody should ever go!!!! EWWW! I'm gonna have nightmares from all this... total stranger... gloves... petroleum jelly...
And I gotta take in "specimens". Festive.